At the start of each new year, we tell ourselves never to look back on the terrible things that have happened in the past. We make new year resolutions, set new goals and create new to-do lists for 2013, looking forward to fresh new beginnings.
Many single friends I know are either looking forward to another year of single hood awesomeness or a chance to meet that special someone. It always seems so much more uncertain and exciting for the single people as compared to those in relationships. So what’s it in for those who already have a special person in their lives. In 2013, we can all take a little effort to make even 15-year relationships as good as new.
Another year has passed. And in every year, each experience has affected us in some ways or another. Traumatic life events such as a breakup, retrenchment and death can have a huge impact. We may become wiser, warier or perhaps more insecure. Life goals and personal aspirations change. It may be hard, but it is important to recognise how we and our partners have changed. Do not have unrealistic expectations of your loved one and assume he or she would behave the exact same way when you both first met. Instead, it is a good time to slow down and get to know each other again. These changes and inability to adapt might have well been the cause of fights in the past year. Make sure they are resolved and you can start off the year on a clean slate.
When was the last time you listened to each other? When was the last time you paid attention to your loved one’s aching shoulders or problems at work? We always hear about how things become dull and boring after the honeymoon period. But things change precisely because we don’t keep up with the daily evening calls and sweet surprises. We take it for granted that our partner would always be there hence we don’t put in as much effort as we did initially. It’s a self-reinforcing cycle.
To be fair, I know it’s hard to keep up everyday with work and family commitments. But let’s show that we care on a regular, say weekly basis? And let’s be smart about it. We have known our partner for a certain amount of time and if ask yourself, deep down we all know of our shortcomings and we might already have a clue of how we can improve our own relationships without being melodramatic. For me, I would start taking effort to plan our weekends and not leave it all to my partner to find a restaurant, make reservations and buy the movie tickets. :)
Through thoughtful acts, spontaneity and communication, we reassure our partners of our love and loyalty. Understanding that our goals are aligned helps give us a renewed sense of purpose and appreciation for our partner’s presence. Especially for couples who have had a very rough year, be thankful you guys stuck through that long. When we reaffirm our love and desire to make more beautiful memories, we give us and our loved one a great start to the year.
When we work to make each day count, we will be rewarded everyday.
Looking forward to an absolutely amazing year.
LoveByte Cupid <3